Before we left for our trip we had Madyson's, 3k program where the kids get their certificates to go to 4k and we watch a video of them throughout the year and such. She had a blast.
We left for our trip (see post below) and then got home on Monday. On Monday when we got home we had an awkward night. Todd was posted in his almost man cave for 6 hours glued to old movies, the girls ran a muck, and I was trying to clean, cook, and catch up from being gone.
With that said, the next few days were rocky, until finally Todd and I had it out. Now we rarely argue, I think in 5 years I can count on both hands the number of arguments we have had. But this one took the cake. We came to the conclusion that we are both "too comfortable" in our relationship. Our communication is off because 99% of the time we know what the other is thinking, his working takes a big chunk of time, and my frustration of working+kids+household duties+cleaning up all the other time was too much.
So, last week we decided to try, less "idols" (tv, computer, working extra hours) and concentrate on working together as a team on the cleaning, get back to communicating, and such.
IT HAS BEEN A HUGE DIFFERENCE. My stress level is really almost gone because Todd is contributing so much. The girls are more relaxed because I am not there stressing them out and life is back to normal.
So again, I apologize for the absence but I had to do it and will continue to blog every other day, unless something fantastic comes up.
Now...the week was great and Saturday rolled around. Madyson was spending the day with Todd's mom and her family at a family reunion. Todd was working til noon, Aubrie Kate and I were playing that morning, My mom was at Hospice where my Great Aunt is waiting to cross, and then that evening was Dream Night. But most importantly that day was the anniversary of the day my best friend died 11 years ago.
All morning I was in tears, it was affecting me so much that I didn't want to go to Dream Night. I guess all the emotions of not having her here for life, the sadness that the group of friends we belonged too, no longer included me, Madyson being gone away from me that day...everything was just piling up.
Todd got home and I decided to leave and go to the event because I knew that I needed to inspiration of these amazing kids. (I will blog about the event later in the week)
I got home that night around 8:30. Todd had pallets made in the den for us, he had gotten Toy Story 2 for us to watch, he had the girls fed, bathed and ready for a movie and that is what we did, we hung out as a crew of 4 watching Buzz and Woody.
But of course once the movie was over, I had yet another break down. My heart just aches still over all the events that led up to and happened after the wreck that killed Jennifer. I had to sit and pray for about an hour to just talk to God, let him know how I was feeling and say hey to Jennifer telling her all about life and what is going on.
Today is Monday, 7 days before we start VBS at the church. We are busy preparing and I am very excited! about what is coming in 28 days (Ill give you a hint starts with a D-ends with a-Y
I've realized that sometimes Jarod and I get too comfortable with each other too and have to take a step back, and giving up some of the external distractions really help. I love how open and honest you are on your blog...it helps others, myself included, know that we aren't the only ones dealing with these kind of things!
ReplyDeleteI had missed reading, and I'm glad you're back! However, I really understand about "things" getting in the way. I've had to take a step back several times. That being said, I really am glad you're back, because I think your blog is so interesting! :)
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