Strong Willed and Spirited

If you follow me on twitter you know that I tweet a lot about the strong willed child that lives at my house. At times she is the most precious, loving creature and others I wonder how she belongs with us. Todd, my adoring husband, is always quick to humble me and remind me that she is MY daughter.

The past few days, her "spirit" has been making me question what I am doing wrong. As I was ready to throw in my towel, Kelly posted this post by Lisa TerKeurst and bam it hit me.

Growing up, my strong-willed self made my mother insane. She didn't understand why I couldn't do it the way she wanted it done. Why I had to make everything a production, even the simple things like wearing socks.

I believe her best parenting advice story stems from when I was around Aubrie Kate's age. Every morning my mom would get me ready for daycare and I would fight her because the seam in the socks hurt and I didn't wont to wear socks (random fact#1 still hate socks) she was at her whits end when finally my daycare teacher said, "well, why does she need to wear socks?" At that moment, I believe my mom learned its okay to pick and choose battles. Why did I need to wear socks? My shoes fit, they didn't hurt, it wasn't cold. Why fight everyday over socks?

She allowed me to go to school, without socks and guess what? I turned out just fine.

Over the following years my mom had to face the "sock battle" on more than one occasion. She wanted me to be a cheerleader, I did it, despised it, quit it. It killed her, but why did I need to be a cheerleader?

She wanted me to be a nurse, I studied, I tried, I hated it, and it hated me. My lack of compassion confirmed I would be committing my life to a career where I had no freedom to be myself. I will always remember the conversation I had with my parents when I told them I was going to study "Communications with an emphasis in Public Relations" They were baffled by that idea. My dad's exact words were "So someone is going to pay you to communicate? In public?"

The biggest one was when she found out Todd and I were getting married/already married. She didn't see what I saw. I had spent my life in relationship with people (and yes, serious relationships) that pleased my parents. Socially acceptable young men, who had promising futures and could one day provide a better life for me than imagined. I, chose the guy who worked with me at a restaurant, who had dropped out of college, who had long dyed hair, and earrings. It was totally "un-OK" with her that I was making such a huge decision based on something as simple as Love.

My mother begged for prayer from her friends. All which are wonderful Godly women. She needed them at that time and they prayed her through it all.

Fast Forward a few years and now I sit as the mother of the strong willed child. I find myself wondering, "what am I going to do with her?" I call on my friends to pray for me as I go about parenting a child with such a big personality. I find myself having the "sock battle" all over again but with roles reversed.

After reading Lisa's article I am planning on taking a different approach. Do not pray for Aubrie Kate to understand me and my goals for her. Pray for me to raise a child that grows into a  God-honoring Adult. If you can do that for me, I promise to do that for you. Just comment below, and I will add you to my list. At least you know if we run into each other in the mall, and our children are naked, dancing in the fountain, I wont judge you but hug your neck and say, "one day, they will make a huge impact on the world. Hopefully with clothes on :)"